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Is living with your bf/gf okay to do when you confidently believe you will marry that person?

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Is living with your bf/gf okay to do when you confidently believe you will marry that person?

Post  Sarge on Sat Feb 07, 2009 8:11 pm

I ask this question because alot of people today, including believers do this. I know we had this small talk w/ the college ministry one night and I felt like bringing this up on the forum. What are your views upon it Question Also, you may include scenarios because when we spoke about it, there were some stuff that were brought up but it was hard to come up w/ a direct answer.

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Re: Is living with your bf/gf okay to do when you confidently believe you will marry that person?

Post  Rodel on Sun Feb 08, 2009 12:03 pm

To simply answer the question... No.

And my take on things...

One account from the Bible I can refer to is from Genesis 2:24 (and more throughout the Bible). Notice it says man and wife. I think it's clear the only time a man and woman to be together is in marriage.

Secondly, when a guy and a girl come together or live together (bf & gf), it's really, really, super-duper hard not to fall in to sexual sin. I don't think we can ever withstand sexual sin and I don't think we're ever meant withstand it. I can't picture a person in a relationship (other than friendship) can keep their hands off each other living together. Can you?

Instead, we're told to flee from it as 1 Corinthians 6:18 says. With that being said... I don't think it's even a case of "is it ok or not".

I'm convinced that marriage is the ONLY way to go, and it's for us to enjoy the benefits, from God himself. cheers
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Re: Is living with your bf/gf okay to do when you confidently believe you will marry that person?

Post  Sarge on Mon Feb 09, 2009 7:21 am

So, how would I approach a friend that I know allows that to happen? And this guy is not a believer but she is. I want to tell her but I just can't find the words in what to say to her.

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Re: Is living with your bf/gf okay to do when you confidently believe you will marry that person?

Post  CLER on Mon Feb 09, 2009 7:42 pm

LOL on Rodel's "super duper hard".

But yea I agree with Rodel, it's a big N-O. It doesn't matter if you're really sure that you're going to marry this person or not. Plus if they're really sure they're going to marry each other... why aren't they married yet?

Churches are also responsible in this kind of discipline. If the church knows that one of their members are shacking up, they need to approach this person/couple. But as for your situation right now, I would encourage you to prayerfully rebuke your friend using the Scripture. If this friend is truly a Christian, she should be convicted. If not convicted, you take another sister in Christ with you to talk to your friend again to show where she is in error. If she still doesn't decide to make any changes, this is where it kinda gets complicated... if this person goes to same church as you, you need to let the leaders of the church know. Now the leaders should approach this person and show where she is in error, then if she doesn't do anything... the whole church needs to be involved, meaning be put in blast. This is the Biblical way to do this as reference Matthew 18:15-20 for discipline.

Now if your friend goes to another church, do the same above beside the telling leaders part... unless you know the leaders. Now I don't know what's the other option on that. The important thing is talk to her, pray for her. Use the Scriptures. I'll dig up some to back you up on this.

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